Before you unsheathe your sword and draw blood, we have to go on record saying we’ve nothing against any love, any expression of love or celebration of love. But is love something to be taken out, aired or rather flaunted on one particular day in a year? And that too, in terms of absurdities like size too small lingerie, red plastic hearts screaming ‘I love you’, an overdose of heart shaped chocolates cakes and cookies and roses, roses and more roses. What happened to pure unconditional love throughout the year? Love is as love does and we have got together too many reasons why Valentine’s Day is injurious to health, whether in love or not.

• Valentine’s Day is an oxymoron love, especially romantic love is supposed to be spontaneous. You can’t pick a day and say I’ll go all lovely dovey today. In my opinion love is supposed to be forever.

• Valentine’s Day is speculated to be a pagan festival of mid February where the men whipped their wives with animal hides as they ran through streets while boys drew cards with the names of local girls that they were then compelled to court. And if a boy did not like his partner, he deserted her and the girl was forced to remain in shameful isolation for eight days. Where is love in all this?

• Valentine’s Day is a bourgeois capitalist fallacy created by gold digging capitalists aimed specifically at driving us out of our minds. Those in love are supposed to love 365 days and not just once.

• Love is like pregnancy, either you re pregnant or you’re not. Similarly, you can’t be more in love on one single day in a year.

• Love cannot be distilled into a day or a ritual of gift giving on one day.

• We would like gifts, even small ones, every day.

• Besides, you may not feel so loving and giving on February 14th. You may feel more like it on the 13th and 15th. You never can tell. Love, by the way, is not a switch button.

• Love doesn’t have symptoms. It is not an ailment and the antidote is certainly not sickly pink plastic hearts, chocolates or overbooked restaurants.

• It’s not enough to put a girl off pink forever, especially the nauseating ‘digene’ digestive pink.

• If you really, really want to give your heart away, you should become an organ donor.

• The more gifts you get, the more loved you are. How do we know that you haven’t sent the gifts yourself?

• Love is also not supposed to make you feel inadequate because you don’t have pots of money to buy tawdry gifts.

• Just how can you love a guy who spouts psycho poetry like ‘you make my days honey warm and my nights sparkling bright’?

• And unisex beauty parlors are into it too. A Valentine’s Day package for you and your love. Doing what? Watching him get a pedicure and his nostril hair removed. Quite a turn off.

• If you happen to be alone at beauty parlor on this day, it’s sickening to listen to women blabbering on and on about boyfriends/ husbands or gifts of Valentine’s Day plans.

• Ever wondered how much money you could have saved if you didn’t have to shell it out on stupid gifts, which have no use for valentines.

• Everyone from Kota to Kanyakumari goes valentine. Even if they can’t spell the word.

• Valentine’s Day is hell on people with bad memories.

• To reiterate, the only motive behind Valentine’s Day is money, money and more money. Our money that goes to line the already fat pockets of manufacturers wallowing in money. Why should someone else make money out of your love?

• We hate the non stop run of lovey dovey movies on all channels in all languages.

• Valentine’s Day is really bad for relationships, if the expectations are too high. And when there is high disappointment, the heart goes all a plummeting, which is again bad news for the heart.

• It is also not good for mental health especially of the young generation. It creates fanciful expectations of being in love and living happily ever after. A very rose tinted view like this can cause our future generation to become extremely disillusioned in real life later on. Heartbreaking, that is.

• And lastly, with the crass commercialiasation, we’re losing both our love and our saints.