Today, EQ or emotional quotient is as important as IQ or intelligence quotient for success in life. Intelligence as a concept has been reinvented to include emotional skills as well as verbal, mathematical and logical abilities that used to previously define it. An emotionally intelligent child has greater self awareness and the ability to control his/her moods and impulses, and to delay gratification of his/her needs as well as the capacity to empathize with others and develop better interpersonal skills.

How can you develop your child’s EQ? 
By creating a safe environment for your child, to express her feelings and emotions. You will then be able to recognize subtle shifts in mood that may be early warning signs of trouble; you will be able to investigate the reasons for his/her emotional changes. If this safety net is missing, your child will quickly learn to mask his/her feelings or tell you only what you want to hear. On the other hand, if your child confronts whatever what he/she is feeling, it will help increase him/her from being stuck in it.

Build an emotionally cued home:
Children often have difficulty describing what they feel. Helping your child find the right emotional vocabulary is one of the first important steps you can take. Young children may misread others’ emotions and confuse, for example because of shame and guilt. You can teach your child to interpret spoken and body language. Show him/her how facial expressions give us clues about how people are feeling. Give him/her a feeling word and ask him/her to enact different ways of expressing it. By being self aware, your child is also able to recognize and correctly respond to feelings in others. Try to respond to the child’s feelings and not merely to the behavior or the problem at hand. Also show him/her your own emotions. He or she will learn to deal with his or her feelings in appropriate, constructive ways from you.

Use ‘I’ statements to express your own feelings:
For instance, say, “I’m afraid you will fall and break your arm if you jump from bed”, rather than, “You’re going to kill yourself if you continue jumping”! Using an ‘I’ statement indicates to the child that you’re responsible for your feelings aren’t a mere puppet reacting to external pulls and pressures. ‘You’ statements blame, accuse, judge, label and belittle the child, while an ‘I’ statement means you own up to your feelings and accept responsibility for the consequences to follow.